The Good, The Bad, and The Baby

Always Find Matching Socks To Avoid Judgement

Socks Do Not A Good Parent Make

“I guess dad couldn’t find socks”

It starts with such a simple sentence. But tone, body language and intent can change the meaning.

Recently I’ve noticed socks seem to be an indicator of a well organized super mom.

The Cotton tale + play cafe near us requires all guests to wear socks. So after taking off Victoria’s winter boots Andrew and I wrestle her into socks before setting her loose. As she races to climb the wall to the slide another mom looks at me, arms crossed, smirk on her face, and says ‘how cute, you don’t have matching socks for your child.’ I just smiled and walked past because I was a little taken back by how she said it. Her tone was rude, her body language and facial expression was judgemental. Why did it matter if Victoria had matching socks? She just running around the play cafe, she’d be barefoot if she had her own way.

A couple days later Andrew, Edward and I were at the salon. Edward was practising his stair climbing as one of the hairdressers stops to say hi. She sits on the stairs, smile on her face and looks at Edward as she says to me ‘he always looks so dapper and put together, even with mismatched or just one sock.’ I just laughed and said matching socks are overrated anyway and we continued to chat.

These were two very similar sentences but one made me feel judged and frustrated and one made me smile and laugh. Reading both, you may not notice a difference. Both statements could be taken either way, but different circumstances can make all the difference. Although, being honest, the kids are rarely in footwear, let alone socks if we can avoid it. We still have to put Victoria in socks in her boots and bar at night, so if she can let her feet breath all the better!

Why do we need to feel judged over socks? They’re just socks. I used to feel awkward when I dropped the kids off a childcare when they had odd socks. I’d look around and see all the other little kids in matching socks, but who cares? At least I could find two socks that fit. I’ve realized the childcare staff don’t care, the other kids don’t care, my kids certainly don’t care, so why should I?

Photo – Flickr/mgessford



Andrew • 23 January 2017

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