Surely this was a teachable moment?
I had just picked Victoria up from childcare and was doing up her seat belt. In her hand she had the cookie given to her on the way out of the door. Supper was at least an hour away and I was already starting to get hungry.
So I asked for a bite. And she said no.
Surely this was a teachable moment, when I should adminish my daughter for not sharing. Greed, gluttony, selfishness, some other sin?
Or maybe I respect her ability to make a choice. I asked and she said no. If I then forced the issue she may or may not listen to a lecture about sharing, but what else would she learn?
What would it say about the way I treat her? I respect you and your decisions only so far as they are the decisions I want you to make.
Or maybe I could just respect that my daughter said no. And accept that the real reason I considered lecturing her about sharing was that I was hungry and didn’t like her answer.
So I said nothing and got into the driver’s seat. As I drove home I remembered a phrase I’ve held onto for years: Don’t ask the question if you’re not going to listen to the answer.